


changkyu | miserable at best

by plincess_cho (ai_hao)



Series: 잠들고 싶어 (In My Dream) | Changmin x Kyuhyun [8]
Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, Super Junior
Genre: Author: Ai, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-20
Updated: 2015-11-20
Packaged: 2018-05-02 11:25:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5246573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ai_hao/pseuds/plincess_cho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I can live without you but without you I'd be miserable at best.</p>
            </blockquote>





	changkyu | miserable at best

Kyuhyun morosely sets plates and cutlery around the dining room table while his mother bustles around the kitchen. Ahra and her husband will be coming over soon after collecting Papa Cho from the airport. Kyuhyun doesn't feel like interacting with anyone; all he wants to do is curl up into a ball and wait for the next three years to be over.

"Can you put this on the table please, Gyu?" his mother asks. She hands him a steaming bowl and he does as he's told. They repeat this process several times before the table is filled with hot dishes waiting to be devoured.

The front door opens and in walk the expected three. Ahra's husband holds the door and lets his wife and father-in-law walk in first. Kyuhyun's mother greets them warmly while Kyuhyun hangs back, uncharacteristically quiet.

"Gyugyu? Are you okay?" his sister asks softly as she hugs him.

"Changmin enlisted today," their mother says.

Kyuhyun doesn't say anything.

He feels bad, really. He hardly gets to see his family and knows he should cherish the time he has with them, but his heart is too heavy to be joyful. He only pokes at his food even though his mother had made his favorite dishes, and he asks to be excused before they've even finished. His father is about to tell him to stay, but his mother gives him a look that says, "Let him go."

"I'm a little confused," his brother-in-law says. "Who enlisted?"

"His best friend," Ahra replies. "They were supposed to go at the same time since they were born only 16 days apart but..."

"Ahh," he says. "I understand."

 _No, you don't,_  Kyuhyun yells internally.  _You don't understand. You weren't left behind when your best friend enlisted._  Kyuhyun shuts the door to his bedroom and flops face first onto his bed. He buries his face in his pillow and soon his body is wracked with sobs.

"Maybe I should go talk to him," Ahra says after a good twenty minutes have passed. She stands up from the table and pushes her chair in.

"I think that'd be nice," her mother says. "Maybe I'll start a pot of tea. Would any of you like some?"

"I'll have a cup," Papa Cho says. 

"So will I," her son-in-law says. "Let me help you."

But she waves him off. "You relax. I've got this."

Ahra softly knocks on the door. When she gets no response, she pushes it open and lets herself inside. She finds her younger brother laying on his stomach, staring out into nothingness. He doesn't move his head when she comes in. She sits down on the bed next to him and starts rubbing his back gently. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asks.

It takes him a long time to respond. "No."

"Okay," she says.

They sit together in silence. Ahra can feel the tension in Kyuhyun's body melting slowly under her touch, so she keeps stroking his back. "Do you remember the first time you brought Changmin over?" she asks. "I couldn't believe I was meeting a celebrity, and you got mad because you were already a celebrity." Ahra smiles. "But Changmin was so nervous and awkward that I wondered how he'd managed to become an idol." 

Kyuhyun doesn't say anything, but he rests his head on his hands and focuses on her knees instead of staring off into space. "All of my friends were so jealous of me when I told them that I'd met a DBSK member," she continues. "I told them that my brother was a Super Junior member and they should be just as jealous."

Kyuhyun stays quiet, so Ahra keeps going. "Or do you remember that time Mom found a pair of Minho's boxers iced in the freezer after one of your kyuline sleepovers? She'd had some friends over and was so embarrassed when one of them pulled them out."

A smile twitches at the edges of Kyuhyun's mouth. That had been a particularly entertaining night. That was when they discovered the Minho has the alcohol tolerance of a high school girl and Changmin had exploited that to the utmost. Minho had woken up the next morning sans underwear and had to explain to his manager why they needed to go to the department store before heading to the KBS studio. Changmin and Kyuhyun had practically died laughing at poor Minho's expense, but he eventually forgave them after they brought him back a variety of treats from their overseas concerts. "Mom was so mad," Kyuhyun whispers.

"Yes," Ahra replies. "But not as mad as the time you brought all of the boys over already drunk on their anniversary. I thought she'd kick you all out for sure!"

Kyuhyun remembers that well. They'd been out drinking since they hadn't seen each other for awhile. After calling into Shimshimtapa and probably making fools of themselves (Kyuhyun got a angry text from his manager that he read the next morning), they found themselves in front of the Chos' apartment complex. After they'd woken up Kyuhyun's parents (drunk kyuline wasn't exactly the quietest bunch), Kyuhyun thought for sure his mother would make them leave. But, being the angel she was, she let them stay, and the next morning, the three of them woke up to large bowls of hangover soup. 

"Guess she doesn't have to worry about that anymore," Kyuhyun replies sadly. He sighs deeply, and Ahra can see the tears trickling down his face.

"He'll be back before you know it," Ahra says softly. 

"But I'll be gone."

"So he'll be preparing for you to come back," she replies. "Probably trying desperately to grow out his hair and build his alcohol tolerance back up."

"Yeah."

There's another silence. Ahra wishes that she could do more, but only time can heal this particular heartbreak. She feels exceptionally glad that her husband had already completed military service before she'd met him, and even though she isn't particularly looking forward to sending her brother off, she hardly sees him anyways. But it would be different.

Finally she says, "Come on, Mom's made tea and we need to save my husband from Dad's endless stories about Taiwan." She stands up and pulls gently at his arm. He obediently follows her back into the living room, albeit lethargically. His mother hands him a warm mug of tea and sits him down on the couch. She hands another mug to Ahra before sitting down herself next to Kyuhyun.

"I'm so sorry for coming at such a bad time," his brother-in-law says apologetically.

Kyuhyun waves him off. "You didn't know. It's fine."

The others talk around him while he quietly sips his tea. It’s hot and he can feel the warmth spreading through his body. He had originally planned to come back and drink himself into an oblivion, but his mother had intercepted him first. Now, instead of leaning against an equally drunk Changmin, he leans against his mother and rests his head on her shoulder. She pats his knee and continues chatting with the rest of the family while he slowly closes his eyes.

*

Kyuhyun wakes up on the couch a few hours later. The room is dark but the electronic numbers on his watch tell him it’s one in the morning. He sits up and blinks. His contacts feel like sandpaper so he trudges to the bathroom to take them out. He looks at himself in the mirror and sees puffy red eyes staring back at him.

Eyes red from crying.

Because now, Changmin is...

But his brain doesn’t let him finish the thought. There’s a growing lump in his throat as he drags himself to bed. But this time, there is no equally drunk Changmin next to him complaining about him hogging the blankets. There’s just the eerie silence of being alone.

_Three years is a long time to wait._


End file.
